Androgny Tilt

My second match was “Miriam,” so I’m all looking for a girl. I see no girl. A guy comes up to me and says “Hi I’m Lulu. I’m playing you next.” I’m all…a boy named Lulu? Okay, whatevs, but…”no, I’m playing Miriam.”
“That’s me,” he says, “but I go by Lulu.”
Alllrriiighhtyy Then.
Lulu says he’ll she’ll be right back, he’s she’s going to the bathroom. I immediately want to follow him her to see which one he she really goes into.
I refrain.
Of course, as we set up the board there’s the usual “where are you from” conversation and he she says “I’m originally from California. San Francisco.”
OF COURSE you are, I say in my head.
The first word he she plays is “hard.”
I lose it.
Then lose the game.